Hi guys its 16/9/24 . Today i thought id talk about deferent perceptions of what people refer to as a Blackout. Its widely accepted in AA circles that a Blackout means impending doom. Lets have a closer look at what a Blackout is.
Literally most people who have drank alcohol or used drugs have experienced some sort of memory loss. Im talking doctors, nurses, lawyers, teachers, millionaires and billionaires, from royalty to the homeless , all different walks of life but the end result is the same .
Hopefully i can point out a few things that are helpful that can describe and also help explain why we sometimes do things while we are drinking that we later regret. The shame, embarrassment , remorse, guilt everything that stems from memory loss other wise known as a Blackout.
Losing your memory to the point you've blanked out and have done or said things you later regret are are repeatedly seen as “ classic “ signs of problem drinking, in reality this is beyond reasonable doubt an absolute unavoidable consequence for anyone who drinks regularly or heavily.
Lets have a look closer at BLACKOUTS. It is scientifically accepted that alcohol impacts a person’s memory. So you if you have experienced one YOU are NOT going to be doomed and a raging alcoholic in need of the nearest treatment centre. A lot of it when you break it down is common sence when you apply logic and reason. That brings us on to the brains role in Blackouts.
A Blackout is triggered not by the degree of intoxication on any occasion in particular, it is more to do with the accumulation of our drinking over time. People do not have to be literally blind drunk to suffer from interference with our brains memory .We just need to basically maintain a certain level of intoxication over a certain time frame.
Any human being can suffer complete memory loss or short term memory loss even even when we are far from being fully intoxicated. This is importaint to note. As just with probably everything else involving alcohol and addiction in general there is honestly a very straightforward logical explanation for experiencing the phenomenon that is a blackout. This is mainly in part down to alcohols effects on the limbic system ( see my other blog) which are well known physiological and psychological effects of the drug and how it impacts our central nervous system.
An alcoholic / Drug induced blackout is made up of three key things 1 being the immediate effect of the alcohol / Drug or Drugs & 2 being the withdrawal from the alcohol / Drugs and the latter being the effect that alcohol has on our memory.
When someone experiences a Blackout there can be a feeling of complete confusion and despair as well as devastation. Depending on the persons beliefs? Take AA for example the person who has lifted one drink could feel that god and all faith has abandoned them and that they have completely lost all control and are now powerless. They might even feel like they are going mad or are becoming out-and-out borderline schizophrenic.
When this happens it only adds to the feeling that they are born different to other people and that there is something inherently wrong with them. People do not become powerless far from it. 1 bad day at work doesn’t mean your bad at your job, id also like to point out in a positive way ( im not encouraging it) neither do i advise it) however the reality is if you lifted a drink or a drug 1 night and were fortunate to live to tell the tale? Then that 1 night does not and never will undo all the hard work and good you have done. You are NOT back at the START.
I have been there , in fact it stopped me blogging as i was so ashamed and felt a fraud. I covered that in my last blog. However i came up with an analogy that even though a leopard can’t change its spots ? That is folly to assume that a human being can’t change their attitude and also show gratitude as they can i can and you can ( my way your way ) it dosent matter all that matters is what works for each person struggling with addiction. I am a dog lover i have a Saint Bernard and a 5 month Newfound. I find comfort in walking my dogs with my wife in the afternoon before the school run .
I mentioned perception earlier, basically as human beings our perception of what is good and bad is linked to our own life experiences. Think of the war that’s currently raging in Ukraine if you were unfortunate enough to be in the middle of that war zone then a bad day could concist of your best friend loosing limbs, or one of them being blown to bits so badly that you carried whats left off them into the back of an armoured vehicle which happened to my friend big A who was part of 1 ( PARA ) “parachute regiment “ and part of the hostage sas team in sierra leone known as “operation Barras” he ended up spiralling into alcoholism and suffering badly from PTSD . I think we sometimes have to take stock in order to realise that our worst days are some peoples fairytales or dream ending . Job vs no job — A warm home vs homeless fighting hypothermia and mocked by society. Having children or longing for children but infertile and unable to to have any.
When it comes to AA im neither against it or for it. It helped me in my early days. My friend is now on the mend thanks to AA . He found it tricky to start with as he was trained to show no emotion “ kill or be killed “ years of training instilled into him not to show emotion and then completely flip flopping to sharing his emotions at AA meetings was a bit strange to start with but he eventually enjoyed it . Last i heard he still attends meetings. :-) In AA i can honestly say i met some of the most wonderful people. I just dont have the time on my hands anymore im busy with 2 autistic sons and a teenager who is in the middle of some sort of identity crisis . Ive not ended up in jail or an institution, i am here writing blogs to try help people have a better understanding of addiction as its not all black and white.
Ive just blackout my dinners going to go cold 😂😂. Im sorry ive not written as prolific as id like. If the person in south dakota that took time to email me reads this then thanks again it convinced me to start writing again. Not for myself but for other people. Thanks if you read this can i urge any readers to leave reviews id like to know if my blogs are reaching people and what i could do to improve. Best wishes joe. I can also be found via twitter @Joeyoung2021
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